THE DEAD WATCH YOU MASTURBATE

What if the dead are attracted to impending orgasm? As you close in they swarm and beat about your skull, inside and out, and then they settle in, hanging on for a li’l jolt. When the moment comes, they flare from your head like an invisible crown of light, stiff, vibrating slightly as they feed. 

Whatever you do, don’t think of this the next time you... 

Well, you know.